It's been a while.

Man, it's been forever since I updated. I can't believe it. Since then, I have pretty much fallen off of the diet wagon. It happened towards the end of last semester, and I am so ashamed of myself. I'm almost afraid to step on a scale!

Tomorrow, I am going to officially join WEIGHT WATCHERS. As in paying for the meetings and attending the meetings.

This past Christmas is the last holiday where I cringe at photographs of myself.

A picture is worth a thousand words.

Due in large part to my mother's incessant questioning, I have decided to blog about my progress as far as weight loss goes.


This was me in December 2009.



This was me in August 2010.

This is me today (October 6, 2010).


Since December 2009, I have lost 47 lbs.

I lost 33 of those 47 lbs since July of this year.

Sometimes it's a daily struggle. Sometimes it's easy. As the stress of the semester picks up, it becomes increasingly more difficult to maintain a losing streak. Of course, this is in large part due to the fact that I have become a bit addicted to Chinese food. Still, as long as I lose consistently, I don't feel one meal a week (sometimes two..) is so horrible.

First week of my senior year!!!

Tomorrow will be the end of my first official week as a senior in college! And boy has it been a long week!!!

To begin with, I have apparently lost my mind. I say this because I decided that 5 upper division English classes and Latin were the way to go this semester.

I am currently enrolled in:

Chaucer's Canterbury Tales
Children's British Literature of the 20th century
British Literature I
Victorian Literature
Women Writers of the 19th century
AND last, but certainly not least, Intermediate Latin.

Here's the breakdown of what I think.

CT: LOTS of work. I have had this professor before. She's the reason I am retaking Brit Lit I. She's a hard teacher. Hopefully it'll be good.
Children's BL: FUNNN. Love this professor, love the class!
BL: This professor is MUCH better than my last one. I think I'll like it!
VL: Like this one, too!
WW: AWESOME. We're reading Jane Eyre, and yesterday we watched Sense & Sensibility. :D
Latin: It's an online class. It's alright so far!

The bad thing is is that it's only the first week, and I've been working my BUTT off to keep up with the reading. I started studying for the GRE, too. Basically, I spend nearly all of my free time doing schoolwork.

AND walking everywhere! I don't remember what I walked Monday, but Tuesday I walked 5.22 miles, Wednesday 4.07 miles, and today 4.72 miles. Not only that, but I lost SIX lbs and went down a pant size. Basically, I totally rock!

Size does matter -- or does it?

So, anyone who has ever felt the least bit self-conscious about their body knows that size does matter -- even if it's only to yourself. Or does it?

I think this year has been a huge wake up call to me. In January, when I stepped on the scale and saw that I was at a weight I was definitely NOT comfortable with, I decided that I needed to lose weight, desperately so. I decided to go back to my trusty old stand by -- Weight Watchers. It did work. At first. Unfortunately, like so many other things I started to do, I fell by the way-side. I could come up with legitimate excuses if I tried (cost of food, ability to cook said healthy food using only a microwave and a mini-fridge) but it all boils down to one thing: LACK of self-control.

However, when summer dawned and I found myself unemployed, and therefore unable to purchase the junk food/fast food that made up a pathetically large portion of my diet, I began to feel much better. I didn't start off dieting so much as I started changing how I ate, lowering first my sodium and then my sugar intake.

Two months of laying around the house doing nothing but playing video games and (largely) feeling sorry for myself brought me to the realization that I had within my grasp the ability to change my life and to ultimately LOSE WEIGHT.

I started off by trying to be more active. I know, I know, this seems like it would be the most simple concept in the world, but for those who live a largely sedentary lifestyle, the thought of becoming active once again can be rather daunting. My activity came in the form of walks with my brother in the evenings when it was (relatively, at least) cooler.

I will admit that the first time we went for a walk and managed to walk nearly 3 miles, I thought I might die, or at the very least that by legs might fall off. I discovered one thing, however, that I felt much better afterward,

Once I got a job, I decided to go back to Weight Watchers once more. This time it seems to be working for me. I've lost 17 lbs since the beginning of July, and I feel much better about myself. Most of the time. Sometimes, however, I feel as if I have no self control (i.e. tonight when I had cake and ice-cream at a b-day party).

I don't think the problem is with my weight, though. I think the problem's with my head. While my weight is truly a problem, it is not, or it shouldn't be the sum of who I am.

Regardless of what the scale may say, I still have worth. I am an intelligent soon-to-be college graduate with an undergraduate degree in Philosophy. I have a family that I absolutely adore, most of the time. I don't have as many friends as I'd like, but I am incredibly close to my family.

I am beautiful -- inside and out.

I only wish I remembered that all of the time!!

Retail Hell

Hey guys! You probably didn't think I'd ever write again, but I finally decided to.

After a very very long journey encompassing a startling TEN interviews, I am finally employed.`In fact, today is the end of my first official week at said job.

Now, happy as I am to be working -- which I am, believe you me -- there are still some annoyances.

I am working at the store where "every day matters and we want you to be highly satisfied!" (got it yet? If not, just think of the one day only sale every Saturday, and you can probably figure it out!) Now, I've only been there for a week, so I'm still learning things.

For the most part, I really like it. Honestly. I've never worked in an actual retail store before, but I really do like it. But as I said before, there are just some things that bother me. Such as the fact that we really have no supervision. This wouldn't be an issue but in the absence of an actual supervisor, I have multiple co-workers who tell me what I ought to be doing which would be fine if only they didn't contradict one another. OR, in the case of today when I actually had contact with the supervisor, contradicts what I was told to do by her.

The thing that really bothers me about this is the fact that one of my co-workers explains things to me as if I was an idiot or a three-year old. Seriously, I got it. After hours of real training and days spent shadowing, I pretty much have it down pat. It's not that difficult of a job. Also, I am at a loss to say what this co-worker actually does as I see her standing and talking, to her friends/customers/people from other departments.

Bleh! Hopefully this will get better. The lovely paycheck I expect to get on Friday for a whopping 47 hours will be very nice. The one I get the first week of August with like 60 hours on it will be lovely as well.

So, that was my rant for the co-worker issues. My complaints for the customers (which are very few, really) are this:

Why why why must you unfold every shirt in order to get to the size you wish to take/try on??? The sizes are clearly labeled on the front of the shirt in order avoid that very thing! Also, I understand that you have finished trying on your 1229 items in our dressing room. I also understand that you don't wish to place them back on the rack yourself. I'd much rather do it for you than to find them stuck where they don't belong. What I don't understand is why you insist on closing the door so that after I've put up all of the other clothes (of which there were MANY) I find your room filled to the brim with clothing (all of which is unfolded, inside out, off the hangers, etc!)

Also, I understand you might not want to be solicited for credit cards. I don't want to solicit you. Unfortunately, I am required to do so. In fact, I am required to say this entire little script. Fortunately, however, I can and will accept no for an answer. However, if you respond no to my first question (which is if you will be using your "insert store name" card today), I will proceed to my next question (which is if you have one with us) if you respond no then I will conclude with asking you if you'd like to sign up for one. If you don't, for the love of God just stop me when I ask if you have one and say you're not interested, PLEASE! I don't really care, either way, I just have to ask!

And, on a very very positive note: I lost 5 lbs last week! WOOT!!!

Suppose that's all for now, gonna go waste some brain cells playing World of Warcraft! Looking forward to sleeping in tomorrow, laundry, playing more WoW, and GRE prep!

Everybody's working for the weekend!

Except for me, that is.

So, I've been home for the summer for three weeks and still no job. I've been on 4 interviews, put in countless applications, and still -- NOTHING. It's a little bit depressing.

Still, I have hope. My Toys R Us interview on Tuesday went well, I think. I haven't heard back yet, but that could be good news as they are sending e-mail rejections and calling to tell those hired about orientation. There were 30 of us in the group interview, so it might take time to go through all of the various stuff. Hopefully I'll get this job!

If not, I have an interview at Macy's on June 9th!

I really don't like working. I feel useless and verrrrry bored. There's only so much housework I can stand to do. I suppose I could play Sims 2 some, but I just feel like a lay about if I do that. What I ought to do is work on my GRE prep but I am so unmotivated. Last semester was a killer, and my brain has needed some R & R.

If anyone is actually reading, what was your favorite summer job as a student (college or high school)?